'Dad, if I could turn back time'

Like everyone's parents, my parents too were very caring and nice.

My father was very responsible and calm. He was like a friend, used to play with us and help us doing our homework. But when he is angry and loses his temper, we would get it nicely. It happened very rarely and I am the only one who got most from him.

My father ran away from his house (Nellore, AP) to Chennai to join the Indian Air force as his mother was against him joining the Air Force. He sent a letter back home after he got selected. He wanted to have a better life and was very much interested in Armed forces. He was good at English and sports and that was one of the reason he got selected. He was in 11th class when he joined IAF and that was end of his studies.

We are three brothers, my elder and younger brother are very good at studies, I was not bad but I used to get distracted very easily and could never concentrate for more than 5-10 minutes and that's what used annoy my father most.

He used to take three of us on a bicycle to school every day and back home, a distance of 14-15 km. And if it's a movie or circus show it was five of us on a bicycle (including my mother).

During winter we couldn't go out and play, we used to play at home and dad used to part of team most of the times. He was very good at chess and all of us learned it from him.

He was very hard working and always wanted all of us to settle well in life. I guess he had no other ambition.

My father always got appreciation because of my elder and younger brother from class teacher but not mine.

Whenever he used to come to school because of me it used to be for wrong reason. Either I would have failed in a subject, beaten my fellow student, broken something, or damaged something in school. Many times he has told my mom, "I don't know when he will learn."

He knew I was different kind of guy and would like to be in my own world and he used to explain to me very patiently and encourage me. Many times he used to feel bad that he is not able to give all that we asked for. There used to be a waiting period for any big items that we had to buy. We had to wait for six months for our first Bat (signed by Azhar) and one year for a bicycle. He used to put a condition like if we pass with good score he would give us and he always kept his promise.

I remember it was my Hindi teacher Sashi Prabha madam at Air force station school, Bareilly UP, who used to say very positive things about me and she was the only teacher I suppose. She told my father that he is intelligent but only problem is that he gets distracted very easily and that main reason for his poor show.

After my 10th results I was very keen to join IAF but my father was against it saying he doesn't want his son also to be an Airman. He has no problem if I want to become an officer but not Airman. He did not post my application for AIRMEN Selection. Most of my friends who applied got selected. I was very depressed but he sat with me and explained.

I took science stream, and I failed in +2, I was scared to face my father for two reasons -- my younger brother got very good marks in 10th and my other brother got admission in MBBS. All the officers congratulated my father and he used to feel so proud of it. I was so tensed and didn't know how to face my father. My mother informed dad, he came and scolded me for some time and did not speak to me for few hours and before dinner he spoke to saying, "This is not the end. American president Bill Clinton also failed when he was in school and he is US President. I know you are good, maybe you chose the wrong stream, I am not so educated to help you decide your stream. There are lots of opportunities and it's just that we have to choose right path." He hugged me and said he was confident that I would come up in life. I was in tears and cannot forget that conversation we had.

He didn't want me to sit idle at home and re-appear for my +2 sitting at home. He joined me at APTECH. Fees was over Rs 22,000, nearly 2 months salary. After taking the admission he told me just one thing which changed my life completely. He said "As a father I will always be there to support you whatever you do or want to become, but financially may be I cannot do more than this." I was in tears and felt it was most painful year of my life. But that's when I realised that I wanted to succeed.

I am not sure if I met his expectation but I can for sure tell that I didn't let him down.

With God's grace and blessings of my parents I am well settled in life working in MNC and going to complete my MBA next year.

I am a father now and believe me, my daughter is 10 times naughtier than I used to be. I don't say this, it's my parents who say this. I wonder how my parents used to control me.

-- Sudhir Kumar

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