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Rediff.com  » Getahead » 'My mother-in-law rules my family. Help!'

'My mother-in-law rules my family. Help!'

Last updated on: August 05, 2015 04:15 IST
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In a weekly chat with readers, Rediff.com's Love Guru offers relationship advice.

For those who missed the chat on January 29, here's the transcript:

Deep: hi my name is deep i like a girl we met through a common freind 2 months back i didnt expressed my feelings to her yet but we usualy share everything while talking to her on phone we hangout too . but now the problem is yesterday i was bit drunk and i said something wrong to her but she is assuming to b normal but ivv got a guilt now tat hw d hell i cn say di 2 her

Love Guru: Deep, a girl can tolerate many things but not abuse. Especially when it comes when you are drunk, as most believe that's when the truth comes out. So how can you make it up to her, make her trust you again? I have no idea, hopefully if you are hard enough, you could convince her of your good intentions

Classic Engineering: i luv him alot 4mnt huye h relationship ko ab muje pta chala h den he doing time pass with me usne aisa kaha nhi but uska behave ...or mujhe ignore krna shuru kr diya h

Love Guru: Classic Engineering, not too much information, but it looks like he's not serious about the relationship. Do you want to continue in such a situation? Your call

phtu pluto: SirI Love one decent girl she is struggled girl in life, she is good i am also working in co, but cant express. I Know here very well, but she know me in little things, but whenever she mate face to face that time a she looks at me in angry & moreover i dress well in the office time but after coming to home im at normal dressed. but that only made her confusing

Love Guru: Phtu pluto, hard to see why she is reacting to you in the manner, maybe if you improve your general behaviour and style while at home, and be more like how you are at work, she may form a different, better opinion, about you

rediffganesh: Hi Love Guru...!!i like someone...when i proposed her..she..never react on this topic..but some day later when forced her about this..then she was..angry with me..and she told me i m not intrastate like this things..i think she like me n she wont express her feelings with me..so what i do.?

Love Guru: rediffganesh, since she's told you she's not interested, I wonder why you are pursuing the matter? Our mind often plays tricks on us, and I think so is yours, where we see what we want to see, hear what we want to hear. Snap out of it, and accept her reply to you, don't trouble her further, and move on

ravi: Hi lg My wife shares every thing with her mother and she is obedient to her mother. Due to that mother in law rules my family. Due to the same reason (probably) sister in law applied for divorce. I got 2 children; my old mother will take care of them. She is not happy with my wife and both dislike each other. I need happy family how to solve the problem.

Love Guru: Hi, very often divorce is not the solution we all think it is, and I am not talking only of the legal issues involved here. I am not saying it is not a solution, but it must be last resort, not the first. That's what family courts too emphasise. So before you head on that path, see how you can sort out your problems amicably, within the possibilities available to you

shaishav: Hi LG, i am in a relation for the past two years, but for some strange reason i feel that my gf is cheating on me, coz whenever i call her, she is already on another call, when i call her in the morning her phone is swithched off, and if somehow she answers my call she does not talk to me as she used to do before, what should i do ?

Love Guru: Shaishav, the first thing I'd advise is to check with her. Maybe she has another explanation? Often, suspicions ruin a relationship before the facts do. So, to be sure, ask her about her non-availability, share with her your misgivings, and see what she says. Maybe then you will be convinced that she is right, or you are right

rajkumar sharma: pls clear confusion that a gril said one on boy that she want marry with him and only with him and like him only and she talk with another boy and his close friend with 2-3 hrs daily and sms frequently to him.

Love Guru: Rajkumar Sharma, I didn't realise that a girl is barred from talking to other men if she is in a relationship. Suppose the situation was reverse, in place of the girl put the boy, will it still be wrong?

anjali bhanot: i like someone who is 6 years younger to me am 33 he is 28 am a lady... will this relationship is worth

Love Guru: Anjali Bhanot, what's age got to do with it? Just go ahead

tank: Myself 51 year old, my wife 44 year old, One year before remove the uterus by operation(lesar type not major stitches) Now we both are doing Yoga in moning 6 to 7. My question is she is not ready to accept my propose to do routine sex. How I can get sucess in this matter LG.

Love Guru: Tank, this question is better addressed to a medical doctor, this is beyond my expertise. I hope you understand

Aalishba khan: a very flirty guy has proposed me for marriage... he said he has not propose any gal for marriage apart from however he made it clear that i dont believe in marriage.. but wen i check his social site he still flirt wid gals..

Love Guru: Aalishba Khan, so you have run into a serial flirt. Yes, there are some men who are like that. They mean well, but are incapable of being pinned down by one woman. Don't go by his words, but by his deeds. If you are okay with it, carry on

Ranjan: Hi I love a girl but I can't purpose her what to do.

Love Guru: Ranjan, proposing is an art, so do it well. Be confident, but not cocksure. Be earnest, but not insincere. Say the right words, not meaningless stuff. And dress neatly, and yes, use a decent perfume, but not overpoweringly so. Treat it as you would a job interview, only, this is much more important

Illustration: Uttam Ghosh/Rediff.com

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