'A movie star is interested in my girlfriend -- help!'

Love Guru says, Hi there, everyone...welcome to the Love Guru chat! Let's get started solving your relationship issues.

hey asked, hi lg ..i m going through sm prb due to recession ............but to add salt to the wound she also seems to be neglecting me ..what to do ?

Love Guru answers, You can tell her how you feel...explain that this is a difficult time for you and you need her support. Also make an effort to remain cheerful, because nobody likes to be around a grumpy person constantly -- maybe that's the reason why she's neglecting you?

rajesh asked, Hello L.G I am Rajesh, I am married since last 5 yrs. Our age is 34 & 32 respectively. We both are working the issue start that my wife likes to my Males friends rather than females and some how she gets attract to new guy in her office. This is happen 3 times. When she is involved her nature is very sweet and soft. But when I came to know about it she deny it and always say that they both are good friends. When later on the issue is closed her nature dramatically change she is always angry and high temper. I am really getting depressed by her nature. Please LG help me.

Love Guru answers, Rajesh, there's no need for you to tolerate this behaviour. You need to put your foot down. Explain that you're not a fool not to know what's going on and also that she's severely compromising your marriage, whether she's actually involved with her colleague or not. She should be seeking attention from her husband, not from other men. Fear of losing you may knock some sense into her.

asp asked, Hi, My wife does not want to have sex, what shud I do.

Love Guru answers, Discussion about this is vital. Without losing your tempers, you need to sit down together and talk about what is bothering her. You may also need to visit a counsellor/ sex specialist, depending upon the type and severity of her problem.

Abhijit asked, I love one gril but she wants my picture

Love Guru answers, ??? She's never seen you? Well, give her your picture then!

jaidev asked, i am 32 yr old guy my parents found a girl for me say yes top her as she is highly educated ,but when i go to see her ,i find her figure unattractive.her chest is almost flat,where as i am very smart guy ,always want my girl to be good figure .now i don,t know how to tell them no from my side.i don,t marry a girl whom i don,t find sexually atrractive.as it is very important factor for marriage life.you agree with me love guru.can you give me valid reason to say her no.

Love Guru answers, You can't be very smart to refuse a good wife because she's flat-chested! And you were stupid to agree to the match without seeing her in the first place! Although I find your way of thinking very shallow, you need to be a man here and just tell them that you have to say no to the proposal. Apologise too, for hurting her feelings. Good luck finding your Miss Perfect -- but remember, beauty on the inside is more important that what you look like on the outside!

rohit asked, Hi lg, I am 26 and like a girl but i think she didn't like me, I dont know whether she has a affair or not, we were in the same school, now I find her on orkut & have date 3-4 times as a friend only, but now i like her & want to marry her. I am unable to talk to her regarding the same bcoz of the fear, that if she will say no, thn wht?? & fear to express my feeling bcoz i never had any gf/affair before... But I like her very much, & other problem is that she is more educated & earning more than me, may she will say no bcoz of this concern. I am trying to meet her on this weekend, kindly suggest wht to do??

Love Guru answers, Rohit, you'll just have to take a chance here and tell her you have feelings for her. Don't mention marriage or anything like that so soon, it may scare her off. In any case, if she says no, you can try talking it out, but a decided no is just that -- so don't push the matter further if she means it. But you'll never know till you put yourself out there and take a chance.

(Advice from the Love Guru does not necessarily reflect the opinions of Rediff.com and should not be considered in the capacity of professional counselling.)

Love Guru answers, Is it a love marriage or arranged? In any case, you'll have to work on the age difference through a lot of compromise. I hope you know what you're doing here, you're old enough to be her father and on the surface this doesn't seem like such a great idea.

June asked, Hello LG. I was in a relation for 7 years broke just 3 months back becuase she was seeing another guy. now met her some days back and came to know that she is not seeing him anymore. I had also met a gal n when she came to know about it she cried n felt bad. she sayd that we dont have any future we can be just gud friends but i feel she is confused what should i do? should i continue to be friend or make my intentions clear to her. I still love that gal. Please help me out

Love Guru answers, If you want to give the relationship one more try you can, but make sure that she doesn't do the same thing to you again. Don't allow people to take advantage of you, even if you love them. You can talk to her and tell her how you feel -- if she's sorry for what she did and you believe she won't betray your trust again, give it another shot. If not, well, you can still be friends. But make sure you take into consideration the feelings of the other girl you met -- it will hurt her no doubt if you leave her, but be honest with her.

vidhi asked, i met a guy through matrimonial site ,get engegaed after 2 months dating,but from known sources we found the guy is already married have 2 kids,when we asks him he says tht he separated from her wife 2 yrs back now he only goes to meet his children,my along with my parents go to even meet his wife asking about him,she says he is alcholoic,some time go voilent,they living separately from 2 yrs,but in between they try to get together .now we don,t whom to believe , but as of now he don,t file for divorce yet,reason he giving tht he talking with hif wife to have out of court settlement.so now its very shocking for me n my parents.we don,t know whether to go ahead with the proposal,as in his story there is lot of loopholes.also is it safe for looking a life partner on matrimonial sites.

Love Guru answers, Vidhi, I think that you should call this engagement off -- this man is not trustworthy and comes with too much baggage. Why, if you hadn't found out he would have married you in what would have been a sham ceremony -- you can't marry a second time when you're not divorced yet! Alcoholic, violent, ex wife, children, deception -- why do you want to take a chance with any of these factors? Drop him. And while matrimonial sites are a good way to meet new people, you need to make sure you know everything about a prospective groom before taking a step. It was foolish to get engaged within two months. Give a relationship time and learn as much as you can about a man before taking the plunge.

xwz asked, i am 36 year old lady ,widower last 7 yrs,have one child who is 16 year old.as life pasees down i feeling more passionate n feeling wanting for s***sometime a guilt feeling surrounds me.some 2 yrs back i met a man he also widower with no child.we really have good time together and involve in s****. even my son is become quite comfortable with him,due to family pressure as we from diffrent religion n caste he is from kerala and brahmin and me from mumbai yadav from up,this relationship get sour.it really gives me nervous breakdown.i still misses him a lot.sometime we still use to get in touch sometime on chat.he still feels tht things get good one day.as i am my parents only daughter i don,t want to hurt them.but living life like even hurting me more.don,t find a way where i find peace in my life.

Love Guru answers, You're 36, for heaven's sake! You're an adult woman, old enough to make your own decisions -- you have a teenage son. Stop considering what society and your family will say and take a stand for something that makes you happy. You lost your first husband -- that was unfortunate, but don't you deserve a second shot at happiness? And your son doesn't mind you having another relationship -- that's the most important aspect of this situation. Go ahead with what you want to do.

karuna asked, I am 30 yr old female. I am in love (since last 5 years) with a guy who is married have a child and is from different caste. He luvs me a lot so do i but he cannot marry me. What should i do should i wait for him or carry on... which is difficult

Love Guru answers, I know carrying on is difficult, Karuna, but it's not impossible. And time heals all wounds. Don't you want a family of your own, children of your own with a man who can give you those things? This guy can't -- he has his own family and has made it clear he cannot leave them even if he does love you. You've wasted five years of your life. Enough. Break it off, because it's not going anywhere. Start looking for a man who will make you happy -- and who is available to you.

maneka asked, i am 24 year old girl ,engaged 3 months back ,we both talked each other almost evryday,but till now he never says me i love you or miss you ,like things,but i want to tell him my feelings toward him ,but due to hesitation i don,t .because i think its always gus who sdays the first ,if i say him may be thinks about me something wrong may be very bold girl.i am watining from his side.how i tell him plzzzz tell me.

Love Guru answers, It's been only 3 months. Maybe you can give it some time. Also, there is no harm in telling someone how you feel about him, especially if you're going to be married! You can say something like 'I miss you, wish I could meet you today' and gauge his reaction. I'm sure he will reciprocate your feelings.

david asked, i love a girl, but shes loves another guy and that guy is in love with my sister but my sister loves some other guy and that guy loves the girl i love and my girl is confused so what shall i do??

Love Guru answers, This sounds more like a game of connect the dots! Look, everyone else aside, why don't you tell the girl how you feel? See if you can work it out between the two of you without bringing everyone else into the picture.

Love Guru answers, What exactly is the question here? Stop letting the abortion bother you so much -- it's in the past and there's no reason why you cannot conceive again. Take a trip to the gynaecologist with your husband and let the doctor tell you it's safe to try for a baby -- you'll feel safe after professional reassurance. As for the junior, if he's pestering you tell him flatly you're not interested and you'll complain to authorities at the office if he keeps harassing you. Tell your husband about it too -- a few stern words from him may keep the cheeky young man from approaching you again.

HiLoveGuru asked, Hi Love guru. I broke up with the only girl i was madly in love with last year. Its been almost a year. Now I don't feel for any other girl. I don't think i going to get committed again. I do get the urge to have sex and also have chances to f*** around. But due to my principles I can't use any girl. What do I do to normalize my life?

Love Guru answers, Sometimes it takes awhile to get over a relationship. I'm glad that you're not taking advantage of another girl in this situation, but I think more than that the problem here is that you've built up your ex so much in your mind, you think that no other woman can compare to her. You're wrong. If you take the chance to really get to know the girls you're attracted to physically, you may find you're attracted to their personalities too. Don't let the past reign over the present and the future.

Sunil asked, I am 30 yr old male married two years ago and have a child. I got a friendship offer from a girl who is unmarried.I dont meet her but i am in touch with her through sms. shall I continue this friendship or stop and tell about it to my wife. meanwhile it is pure friendship relation

Love Guru answers, Why would an unmarried girl want to be friends with you, specially? Don't you find that odd? Tell your wife about it if it's only friendship, but don't expect her to like it. How would you like it if she made friends with a strange man and SMSed him all the time? I think this girl is attracted to you and is setting you up. Friends are okay, but draw a clear line and don't ever cross it, or you will be damaging your marriage in the process.

cibnat asked, Hi LG, I had earlier contacted you regarding my close-minded parents who were not ready to accept my girl because of insecurity. As you had told, I tried explaining them that its my life and I need to marry her and told them my firm decision. They are still not ready to accept. The girl's parents have started looking for other guys. Please suggest me what to do?

Love Guru answers, I'm sorry, I get the same problem several times, so I don't exactly remember your case. But I can tell you that if you're both old enough to get married -- and I don't mean just legally, I hope you are both above the age of 23-24 -- nobody can stop you. Just go and get yourself registered and tell your parents you're married. They can take it or leave it. If you've both made up your minds, noone can stop you.

katrina asked, i love a guy whos an actor 42 yrs of age but he does not love me. what shall i do??

Love Guru answers, Well, I don't know how old you are, but I'm guessing you're way, way younger! It's just a crush -- many women fall for older men at some point in their lives, but that doesn't mean you start thinking of a relationship. It's impractical on a number of levels. Plus, he doesn't love you back. Start dating guys closer to your own age and forget about him.

sanjay asked, hi LG im 29 yrs and in love with girl who i daily sees @ bus stop but not able to talk what to do a bit shy im and feels like she too likes me help me ...

Love Guru answers, Say hello or smile when you see her everyday. Then after a few days you can start up a conversation and introduce yourself. Take it from there.

harry asked, i love a girl but she dont love me what can i do to resolve this problem

Love Guru answers, Unfortunately, Harry, you can't solve this problem. She can't forve herself to love you. So accept her decision gracefully and move on.