Stressed out? Try these easy stress-busting tips

In today's fast-paced world it is impossible to escape the effects of stress. Young or old, man or woman, student, professional or retiree -- stress is the one common factor that binds us all. And what's worse, if you do not actively combat stress and its effects on your life, it could become the cause of serious physical and mental illness.

So what is stress and how can you deal with stress effectively? We spoke to Dr Suman Bijlani (director at GyneGuide, a organisation that addresses health-related issues), who shared some useful tips on how to identify your stressors and how to deal with them.

What is stress?

Stress may be defined as the consequences of the failure of a person to respond appropriately to an emotional or physical threat. In simple words, it is when forces from the outside world affect an individual negatively.

Do you feel pressured and irritable most of the time? Do you snap easily? Have you lost interest in sex? Are your assignments and tasks lagging behind often? If the answer is yes to any of these questions, you may be stressed.

What are the signs/ symptoms that indicate a person is stressed?

These can be any one or combinations of these:

• Irritability, fidgeting, nervousness
• Lack of concentration
• Forgetfulness
• Emotional outbursts
• Lack of sense of humour
• Negative self talk
• Feeling tired all the time
• Lack of enthusiasm for various activities one enjoyed before
• Loss of interest in sex

Some physical symptoms may include:

• Aches and pains
• Sweaty palms
• Pounding heart
• Butterflies in the stomach
• Shortness of breath
• Indigestion
• Diarrhoea
• Eating too much or too little
• Difficulty in getting sleep

There are some other indicators too. For exampls, others may perceive you as being oversensitive or jittery, absentminded or unpleasant. Tasks may seem to pile up and relationships may not be as good as they used to be.

In extreme cases, you may become bad tempered which might cause people to start avoiding you. This could lead to you feeling socially isolated, thus adding to your stress. Chest pain, sleeplessness and anxiety may result, mimicking heart disease.

Chronic stress can take its toll on physical and mental health. The quality of life, of course, is the first to suffer. One stops enjoying oneself, and lethargy and tiredness become the rule. Energy and enthusiasm ebb. Overeating or anorexia may result.

Chronically stressed individuals have a higher chance of suffering from depression, anxiety, sleep disorders (insomnia or excessive sleep), and aches and pains. Medical diseases such as high blood pressure, diabetes, heart disease, digestive problems (irritable bowel syndrome), and skin conditions like eczema and psoriasis are all stress-related conditions.

Weight gain is a common side effect, from inactivity and overeating.

What are the most common causes of stress?
Stress can seep into our lives from various sources. Social or major life events like a birth, death, marriage and divorce; relationship conflicts and break ups; poverty and unemployment; and overwork.

In the case of children and teenagers, job and exam stressors, parental expectations, peer pressure, sexual anxieties are some of the reasons for stress.

Psychiatric and medical illness can also be a cause.

How do you identify the sources of stress?
A stress diary is an important tool to monitor your stress levels and give you objective information on the causes of your stress. Once you know what the stressors are you can then try to deal with the stress.

When maintaining a stres diary, make sure you include these points:

• What caused you stress
• What did you feel (physically and emotionally)
• How did you act/react
• What made you feel better

These are some tips that should help:

• Don't take yourself too seriously. Make plans, but do not get too upset if they do not work
• Plan ahead of time. Study in advance for exams rather than the night before or leave home early in anticipation of traffic jams
• Avoid unpleasant situations and people whenever possible
• Be flexible. Switch to Plan B. Learn to let go
• Don't be too hard on yourself. Forgive yourself, indulge in hobbies, pamper yourself
• Act. If your job is too stressful, sort out matters with your boss or look for a new one. If your partner is having an affair, get yourself a marriage counsellor or apply for a divorce
• Don't be judgemental. Accept others with their faults and limitations
• Surround yourself with people you love
• Laugh, listen to music, take frequent breaks, sleep well and exercise regularly
• Do what you love, love what you do

How should one deal with a stressful situation?
There are 4 ways to deal with a stressful situation:

• Avoid the stressor
• Adapt to the stressor
• Accept the stressor
• Alter the stressor

These 4 As can be used to tackle any kind of stressful situation.

Some individuals may not be able to handle stress effectively and may react negatively to a situation or indulge in self destructive behaviour. Some of these coping mechanisms include subconscious defences, like escapism and denial of the problem.

Some of the negative ways of dealing with stress may include:

• Withdrawal from family and friends/sulking
• Procrastination (putting off tasks)
• Binging or anorexia
• Emotional outbursts
• Venting anger on others
• Eating junk food
• Watching TV for hours

In other cases, more unhealthy habits may make an appearance, such as:

• Smoking
• Alcoholism
• Drug abuse
• Internet or computer addiction

Could you suggest some stress management strategies?

Organise your home and workplace. Avoid backlog, pay bills on time, etc.

Time management in necessary. Prioritise and then create a schedule so that you devote time to all the important activities. Plan your day the night before.

Learn to say 'no' to unnecessary activities and irrelevant tasks. Decide who and what is important in your life. Do not try to please everyone. Going out of your way on a regular basis, allows people to take you for granted and impinges on your time as well.

Enjoy life:

• Indulge in hobbies on a regular basis
• Find 'me' time every day
• Be around friends and family who are positive, who love you and whom you love
• Laugh a lot
• Get a massage
• Meditate daily
• Manage anger by using deep breathing techniques, practising healthy behaviour (speak slowly, stop to think, practise letting go)
• Maintain a healthy lifestyle. Eat right, sleep well and exercise regularly.

A stress diary is a good way of evaluating the sources of stress as well your responses to it.

For example, your diary says that you get angry often because your spouse expects you to take care of the children while he watches TV. Your response to that is to sulk, scream at the kids and grumble, but do the task all the same. The result -- unhappy you, insecure children and marital discord.

You could ask yourself this question -- how can I change my response to get the result I want, which is a loving relationship with my spouse, children and time to myself. The choices: talk to your spouse, get yourself a babysitter or dump that job and stay home so you have more time to yourself.

Once you have identified the source of stress and your unhealthy response to it, you can switch to a more positive way to deal with it.

Some quick stress-relief tips?

• Breathe slowly and deeply
• Listen to soothing music
• Go outdoors for a break
• Count from 1 to 100
• Close your eyes and picturise yourself in a pleasant situation or think of lovely colours, flowers, images, etc.
• Pray or meditate
• Call up or meet a friend