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Rediff.com  » Getahead » Jab we met: 'We realised we could not live apart'

Jab we met: 'We realised we could not live apart'

Last updated on: February 15, 2010 17:23 IST


As part of our Valentine's Day celebrations, we invited readers to write in telling us all about their love stories. We received a tremendous response. Here, as we publish the last instalment of responses, we would like to thank our readers for their enthusiasm and hope they had a fabulous Valentine's Day 2010!

First up Arijit Bagchi shares his love story with Shreya:

We met around back in 1996. We were kids the time and did not know that we were destined to some day be married to each other. We were from the same background and had the same surname (Bagchi) but had no relation to each other.

I was in 10th standard, she was in 6th and we met in our debate class. She remembers every details of when we met in class, but I don't (it was 14 years ago and when you are in 10th standard you do not look at girls from 6th standard).

The Good Part
Fastforward 11 years. It's 2007 and I was working in a IT firm in Bangalore. She was in her last year of MBA in Kolkata. I had my share of failed relationships. I had changed from a skinny boy to a fat guy (thanks to biryani); she had transformed into a beautiful elegant lady. While browsing the internet she searched for me on Orkut. As she remembered me from school, she sent a friend request and I accepted and we started talking. We chatted all the time -- day and night, we ate while we chatted and whiole we slept! After we finished chatting we talked on the phone (my mobile bills crossed the tax I paid to the government). She came across as a very humble person, a very homely kind of  girl. I proposed and she agreed.

Till that time we had not seen each other so we decided to send each other photos. She looked amazing and I looked  FAT (I was 80 kgs) but she still said she liked my looks. We met after six months in the airport. We told our parents and since everything was a perfect match, our families agreed. We were happy.

The sad part
We had to wait for her to complete her studies and gain some job experience. So we continued our long-distance relationship. Differences creeped in and we started fighting. The fights got intense. Our families got involved and they fought too. Finally our families decided that after three years together we break the relationship.

She was now working with a bank and I was in my IT job. My parents took me to meet other girls for new marriage proposals. We had finalised my marriage to another girl and the last talks were due.

The best part
We lost touch with each other over the next 4 to 5 months. At that point she had taken a transfer to Bangalore to make the relationship work but it did not; we kept on fighting. While returning to Bangalore from my hometown I met her in the train. And I till today do not know what happened. She had tears in her eyes and I could not resist. We realised that it is simply impossible to live without each other.

We are ready to fight with each other but not live without each other. So we decided no matter what, we will marry. She called up my parents explained everything and I called hers. Our parents met again, this time very apprehensively, and agreed to marry us off.

The better then the best part
Our marriage has been fixed on March 2, 2010 and it  bliss for us as we have rediscovered each other. We do not fight anymore because we still have a fear of losing each other. Today I love her more than ever. Till date I believe the decision that we took in the train while returning from Jamshedpur was the best decesion of our lives. And the most amazing part is our families are the happiest.


Next Deepika Shenoy shares how she came to marry Manoj:

I was at my lowest point in life. I had lost my grandfather and my beloved dog in quick succession. Work-wise, I was working as a trainer in a sweatshop and not going anywhere. I was overweight and on top of all this, stuck in a sort-of-relationship, which was not going forward and yet I was clinging to it.

A friend introduced me to a friend of hers on the net. We talked, fought and then parted, all on the net. Suddenly, six months later, my friend called me up and told me someone had been asking for my number and could she give it? I was shocked and yet my heart beat faster. I said yes.

The call came in the evening. I still remember Manoj spoke to me for 21 minutes and 33 seconds. And all the while I was trying to process why he was calling me and also letting his silky voice wash over me. We talked of very mundane things. And that followed with increasingly frequent talking and messaging. He saw me through days and nights of frustration. We met and those have to be some of the most beautiful days in my life till then. I feel blessed to say many many more have followed.

Six months after this, he told me he loved me, and I foolishly thanked him and said no. He told his folks soon after and there was opposition since we belong to very different communities and regions. My folks too were very suspicious of someone on the net. And well, to cut a long story short, he stuck it out and made me realise that he was the one for me and we were made for each other. I can't thank him enough for that! Eventually both sides agreed and we had a grand wedding with people from both sides present.

We got married in April 2008 and are now parents of a three-month old daughter who is the spitting image of her father. God has indeed blessed me.


And Manju shares his love story:

We had an arranged marriage. I still remember the first time we meet. My family adn I had gone to ask Arpitha's hand in marriage.

I talked for just 10 minutes and I told her: "I promise to take care of you and that we will lead a happy life."

Of course, just like in the movies our life changed -- from a small family to a large one, from a bike to a car. I am able to achieve my ambitions and it is thanks to the good understanding of my wife. We have lovely daughter now -- Abhigna.

Our life together? I think long term and she thinks short term. She is short-tempered and I am cool.

My Valentine's message to her: I love you. Thank you for being with me.:

'She's the best thing to have happened to me'


Next Asif shares his story:

On this Valentine's Day,  I just wanna tell my wife (Naseem) that: You are the best thing that has happened to me. You are all that I wished for. Thank you so much for being my Wife, my Love and my Life.

This is our story:

It is every parents dream to marry their children off and my parents were no different. After completing my BSEE here in New York back in 2005, as expected my parents started pushing me to get married. Every time marriage was discussed, a rush of mixed feelings ran through my body. On one hand I would dream of her being all this and that and on the other I would worry about how will I know if she is the ONE. I often caught myself wondering about what sort of questions I would ask her and worry about if she turned out to be not the ONE. 

When I went back home to Hyderabad, my parents had quite a few girls they wanted me to meet. For the first two weeks, I went from state to state looking for her but there was no sign of her. By this time, I and my family were exhausted travelling. I gave up and decided to spend my last week relaxing and come back in a year or two. Four days before I was to fly back to USA, my mom met her old friend at a social gathering. My mom happened to ask her about any good girl she might know of. She paused for few seconds and asked if she could meet me first. I happened to be there. I met her and she happened to like me. She revealed about her niece. Since there were only a few days left, I asked if she could have her send me her pictures.

The next day, I received an email with her picture. The picture wasn't clear as she had taken it couple days ago on her cell phone. Like they say "Destiny has everything planned for you", it just so happened that we were able plan a meeting at a central location. I did not know at that time that this is where my search was going to end.

When I saw her the first time the next day in the afternoon, I felt the connection. We talked for about half an hour. The meeting was over and I asked for some time to think it over. It was not until we parted, that I realised how much I was already missing her. I had to see her one more time. I was able to meet her an hour later and the next thing I knew I was engaged to her in the matter of five hours. Five months later she was Mrs Naseem Asif Gilani. Still today, after two years, it seems as if I have just seen her for the first time.


Here Swapna shares how she met her Mr Right -- Krishna:

Being a girl from a small town and concentrating only on my studies (in an all-women college), I did not get a chance to interact with boys much and was really scared when my parents started looking for an ideal match for me.

I was thinking that only if I meet the right person would I say yes, otherwise I would stay single. In my community, the parents talk and arrange the marriage. But I insisted on talking to the guy. Even a few words would be enough. One of my friends had told me that when we meet our Mr Right, we would know it in that instant. And I agreed.

I was waiting for that spark to light as I met many guys my parents brought. But I could not say yes to any. It's not that they were bad matches, but I just never felt that spark. This went on for two years (a very long time, and my parents were losing their patience). That's when through my father's friend I met Krishna at their home.

I felt that I could spend my whole life with Krishna happily. What my friend said was very true. I just trusted my instinct and in two months we got engaged and in another two months got married on April 23.

He is really nice, naughty, romantic, kind, understanding, caring, dependable and intelligent, someone I want to be with 24/7. But as god has decided, as we both are working and coz our work in MNCs decide, we had to stay away from each other most of the time... but u know one secret of Love that love and distance are inversely proportional. Aaa... Yes... we had little fights and sort of... but they only made us understand each other better.

Now he is in US for last 3 months and I really miss him especially on this day...That's it guys. Whether its love or arranged marriage, God always sends the right guy/gal for you. Trust your instinct and life will be beautiful.


Next is Vijaya and Gopakumar Sheppillayar's story:

Many times, I (Vijaya) think my marriage was through divine intervention. When I was three days old, I developed fever due to a bone infection which led me to walk with a limp. As I grew up,  I studied diligently and did my engineering and even came to the United States and got myself a Master's degree. Around this time, as any other Indian father, my dad wanted me to get married and he was worried that guys would not like me due to my leg.

I got rejected by couple of alliances. Although it didn't bother me initially, the constant anxiety of my parents started to get to me. There was a particular rejection that left me really depressed and made me question my birth. Then in January of 2000, when I turned 25,  I  prayed to God that he would free me of this constant pain of rejection. I have never prayed with such sincerity before.

Within a week, Gopakumar (Gopa, as I call him), called me and said he got my horoscope through some magazine and that it matched. He wanted to meet and chat with me, which we did during the week of Feb 14th! He was perfectly okay about my leg and appreciated me for my heart and my mind. We were married two months later and have two kids now. 

It simply astonishes me that we were two people living on two different coasts of the United States and had never met before and there was no reason for us to meet at all. But we met and have become soulmates. What's more, is our characters complement each other. It is like, he was made just for me. He is very understanding and very patient and such a good father. I am not a romantic person but I want to wish him a very happy Valentine's day. I love him very much and hope to have him as my husband in next births. 


Next Shweta shares her story:

We (Shweta and Nishant) met each other in the same office. We fell in love with each other and went around for about three years and decided to get married, even though we are from different castes. We knew that the marriage would be next to impossible if we sought our the parents' consent.

But we decided to take Nishant's parents into confidence first. They gave their consent but the problem was my parents. They trickily called me home (I was working outstation then), and forced me to get married to some relative's friend after knowing that I was going around with somebody. I said that I would do as they said and never meet my boyfriend (I knew if I'll did not do this, they would never let me go). I came back to my workplace and told them clearly that I was getting married to Nishant.

My Parents slowly started thinking that if I did something against their wishes it would become an issue in the society around them. But they were ready to meet the guy and finally decided to get us married. Now I'm happily married to my love for about three years and I'm in the family way too. I am happy to have him as the love of my life and feel proud to have him as a husband.

'She was my angel'


Here Shreeshail shares his love story:

I was 25 when I married her. I had finished my engineering and was trying hard to get a job. One day my uncle called me and asked me handle a computer training centre. When I joined the centre, on the first day itself, I saw this beautiful girl learning computers next to my cabin. I did not dare to talk to her. That continued for six months. I used have a glimpse of her every day for one reason or the other. She never bothered to look at me though.

She was from a very conservative Marwadi family. Luckily one of the receptionists resigned, and the faculty advised me ask her for the job. Since I did not dare to ask her, I arranged it through another staff. Fortunately she agreed to take the job. From then onwards I tried to talk to her more often and we used to have hour-long chats.

I never imagined that I would be so lucky that I will marry her. One day I sent a letter to her telling her how I felt and she took some time but agreed. Marriage was never on my mind though because I was not well settled. Unfortunately I had to leave that place and her parents also came to know about our affair. Since they were from a very conservative family and I was from a different caste, her parents disagreed and started looking for a boy for her. That was when we ran away and got married.

Now it is eight years that we are happily married and I am blessed with a daughter. My wife came as an angel to my life.


Next Dr Vinayak Kubal shares his love story with Titiksha Kubal

Our love story began 16 years back, when both of us were studying in medical school. In fact I was her teacher. In a span of two days after I proposed to her, she said yes and the world changed for me. I had never expected to get the decision so fast, I am really blessed by her company for the last 16 years, we got married in 1995 and are blessed with two son's Sharvaj and Shaunak.

My wife is my lifeline and backbone of our family. The whole family revolves around her. Valentine's Day is every day for us, the freshness of love between us remains active all day and this is what has made our marriage work so fabulously. This year's Valentine Day is a bit different as she is in Singapore with the kids. She has been there for the last one year for an advanced course in psychiatry and will be back in June. This will be the first time we will not be physically together on a Valentine's Day, but our minds are with each other.

I would like to wish my wife a very soulful happy Valentine's Day , Iwish I could be with you honey.


And here Prabhjot shares how she met and fell in love with Vikrant:

I was working with Samsung Engineering in Delhi and he joined this company after completion of my one year as an engineer. We hardly knew each other as we were from the very different departments.

We got to know each other on the "Samsung Foundation Day". We had to perform a group dance and we were total of eight in our group including boys and girls. My partner was a very good friend but somehow some misunderstanding happened between us and I wanted to change my partner. And there came in Mr Vikrant Kumar, who was the choreographer for our dance group.

I used to hate him a lot as he had a lot of attitude. I would ask my friends to change the choreographer as he didn't know anything about dance. But there was something else written in my destiny. He became my partner by chance and we practiced together for the whole month.

That month was a life-changing time for me. I started liking him and I knew that he also liked me in some corner of his heart. We started talking on the phone. He used to call me Chutki because I am very short and I called him BB for Bihari Babu since he is from Bihar. I then felt that I should talk to my mother about our relationship because my mother is my best friend and I knew she would support me in this regard. I told her everything and she said that it was my life and I had to take the decision on my own, she could only stand beside me. I was very satisfied from my mother's point of view.

Finally the time came when I asked him about our relationship but he was not very sure whether we should carry on or not because we are from the very different backgrounds and religions. I liked this in him -- that he made everything clear on the very first day. But somehow I was ready to adjust to his family and religion.

And so he proposed -- carrying a red rose is his hand, he knelt down and told me he loved me and I replied, 'Me too'. And from then we were together.

But it was not always good times. The worst time started for me when he got a job in the Netherlands and he moved there. I thought that everything was over but he proved me wrong and he came to India in Diwali holidays and he asked me to send my parents to his house for the marriage proposal. Me and Vikrant were eagerly waiting for his dad's yes but nothing happened as he needed time to think. Finally my parents called them to ask their decision and it was yes! We were both very happy and so were our families.

Our marriage was fixed for April. After two years, we became one. That's called destiny -- a Sardarni Rajathani girl met with a Kaist Bihari boy and got married -- nobody could think of it and even I couldn't. Now we are living in Holland, happily. He has been the best friend, best boyfriend, best husband and now is ready to be the best father in the world. I love you Shona and remain as you are for the rest of our life.