My mom's sacrifice: 'Amma, I bow to you'

With Mother's Day coming up on May 9, we invited readers to share special stories of sacrifices their mothers have made for them. Here are two responses:

First up is Ramesh Anand's dedication:

My mother K S Chandra is a retired administrative officer from a veterinary university in Chennai. She was the fifth child of my grand parents, born in the year 1948. When she finished her primary education, poverty threatened to stop her from studying further. She was good in academics and was also persistently determined to continue with her education at any cost. So her father found a distant relative who was broad-minded and financially sound enough to take care of her, although the rest of the siblings were indifferent.

It was the toughest decision to make for her father and herself, but rationality won on that occasion. So she sacrificed living with her parents with the single agenda of getting herself educated. She managed to finish her SSLC successfully and found a suitable job as a typist in a government organisation. Though she secured a fixed income for the rest of her life, she spent part of it on books to promote herself to higher positions through exams and to broaden her mind on several subjects. In due course of time, she managed to fix up a good life for her siblings.

She was the philosopher in our neighborhood, such that during my school days, lots of ladies would come to her on weekends to get rational advice on various topics. One thing I still remember is that an older girl from my neighbouring house, who worked as an RJ, would visit regularly to get tips on topics like women's freedom and education for women to broadcast on her radio station. Neighborhood parents would bring their children to receive help with essays on various topics, for them to participate in written and oral competitions. In reality, these events persuaded me to be a rational thinker, a regular participant in competitions and a voracious reader.

So it would be apt to say that her positive energy was reflected in my neighborhood. She raised the conscious positive thinking pattern of those known to her. She grew and made her community grow along with her.

As the subject reveals, she sacrificed her dependability, fear and negative thoughts, which not only brought to her own life absolute felicity, but also to her generation and the generations to come.

Amma, I BOW to you!

Share unforgettable memories of your mom with us. Tell us a special story -- a memory that is very dear to your heart because of something unforgettable that she did for you, in the way that mothers often do. That one incident that reaffirmed your belief in your parent's ultimate sacrifice. And if you can, do send in a photograph of you and your mom to publish alongside.

Simply write in to getahead@rediff.co.in (subject line: 'My mother's sacrifice'), because we'll be publishing the best entries right here on rediff.com

Here is Bangalore-based Aradhana Singh's tale:

What can I say about my mother, who was a larger than life figure for us? She was an epitome of sacrifice and modern thinking. Not only was she much educated ahead of her times, she also did not take up any jobs so that she could take good care of us. In those days, when India had just become independent, being highly educated was rare, especially when it came to women.

While many of her classmates continued to work in different fields of academia, bureaucracy, medicine and engineering, she stayed back at home to take care of her kids. In order to maximise the means to be shared between us, both my parents prioritised good education.

In the '70s and '80s, when we belonged to a not-so-educated society , not having a son was a big thing. My parents would unconditionally and dauntingly support all us sisters and always believed in setting an example in society, of bringing up their daughters like no one can bring up even sons.

She would teach us the importance of education and being independent. She would always say that independence is very important for a woman, especially economic independence. Every day, she would not only take good care of the house and us, but also taught us lessons of life that laid a very strong foundation for our personalities and family values.

She stayed back at home for 15 years and after we all became school-going and were old enough to take care of ourselves, she joined academics to fill up her long and free hours. Being a working woman myself, I still wonder how she took such good care of the family, the house and her job.

When I got through to one of the best B-schools in the country after my daughter was born, I was still confused whether to answer my natural maternal instinct or to take the plunge as a career woman. She took a firm decision to quit her job and take care of my daughter.

While I pursed my dreams, she provided a pillar strong enough to support to my dreams by taking care of my daughter. She is an epitome of sacrifice and I know I can always look up to her for any kind of support that I need.

Hats off to you Ma, for setting aside your ambitions so that we sisters became independent and strong.

If I can bring my daughter up even half as well as she has brought me up, I will consider myself a successful parent.

Riyash-based Ravindra Kumar Sahu has this anecdote to share:

The very word 'Maa' gives us energy when we remember our mothers during troubled or difficult situations in life. I was very young when my father died and being the elder son at home, I had the responsibility of my two younger sisters and one younger brother. During those days I saw the hard work of my mother. She taught us two things: First, to be honest to your work and second, not to talk rubbish to anybody, even if they misbehave with you.

I remember a time when I was travelling from Mumbai to my hometown Bhilai via the Mumbai-Howrah Express train, during Durga Puja vacation. Due to the unavailability of reservations, I was travelling in the general class compartment. Seats were completely full and it was very difficult to even stand inside with luggage. There was a man there, travelling with his wife and daughter. Most of the time he was speaking in abusive language and his daughter was very embarrassed every time he said something. Most people were also using the same language to argue with him .

He was just in front of me and said rude things to me too, many times. After listening, I simply said, "I know you are a good person and because of some problem you are using abusive language. I request you not to use it, because your young daughter is with you."

At my words, he turned into a very gentle person and I was surprised to learn that he was a professor at IIT Khadagpur. He told me that due to some urgency he was travelling in the general class. I told him that I was working in Mumbai as an electrical engineer and going home on vacation. I also tried to arrange for a seat and at Nagpur, his family got the seats.

In Bhilai I departed and around ten years later, he saw me in Kolkata, at the airport. I was going for a meeting. He came to me and said, "Do you know who I am?" I gently said, "Sorry sir, I am unable to recognise you, please introduce yourself." Then he narrated the train story. And he invited me over for dinner.

He invited almost all his relatives over to meet me and everybody showed such kindness, I cannot explain it in words. During dinner he announced that he had not seen a person like me and he always recalls my words and personality when he feels disappointed and it gives him a lot of energy. I replied, "Sir, it was a result of the basic education of my mother, who taught us how to live life."

Now I am abroad and have a lot of friends of many nationalities. But I have never encountered any difficulty. I never forget the education of my mother. She taught us even when we were suffering a lot after the death of my father. If anybody asks me, "Have you seen God?" I have an answer -- yes, I have. She is my mother .

Mothers give us guidance in such a way that we can not only guide ourselves, but others too.

Anjana Narayanan had this to say about her mother:

My relationship with my mom has grown and evolved over the years. From being my mother she has transcended to being my best friend!

Motherhood entails numerous sacrifices and compromises, it is after all a huge responsibility to shape a child's life. I came to realise the true value of my mom, though, when I was going through a divorce from a marriage that had turned emotionally abusive.

My mom is extremely creative and is a wonderful teacher, always motivating kids, keeping them interested by teaching out of the box, giving them advice on career and life. When my sister and I moved to different places to pursue higher education, she decided to focus on her career and help make a difference in today's education system. Realising I was having a hard time with my marriage she put her career, ambitions and ideas on hold without any hesitation so she could help me get over the rough patch. She helped me believe in myself again and in my future, in God and goodness.

It was then I saw how strong a person she was, how much depth and understanding she had, and her boundless love helped me heal. This Mother's Day I hope that she can get back to her dreams and goals as I stand steady. I hope and pray she achieves all the success she deserves and that the change she brings about will brighten other people's lives as it has mine.

Moms are a girl's best friend, I would trade in the Kohinoor diamond any day for her. :)

And finally, we have Rajesh Tripathi's short note dedicated to his dear departed mother:

Almost three and a half years have passed since I lost my beloved mother. But to this day, she is by my side.

The day I lost her, the whole world took on a new meaning for me and I became alien to my surroundings.

I had never dreamed of a life without her and it's been difficult to this day even to imagine she's gone, as my world revolved around her.

Now we realise that she was the source of our inner strength and life will never be the same again for me.