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Seven ways to boost your lover's libido

April 22, 2009 11:23 IST

Feel all revved up to have some hot action in bed but partner doesn't share the same sexual appetite? Well, then it's high time you did something to solve the problem.

Sexual incompatibility among partners can be attributed to many events like childbirth, stress, or loss of a loved one.

Other sexual difficulties, like problems attaining orgasm, a waning sex drive, or erectile dysfunction can also have one partner far from looking forward to lovemaking.

But, all the above problems can be dealt with the help of your doctor and/or sex therapist, reports Fox News.

And if all the above reasons do not explain your case, then you should assess how your relationship has evolved, and do something to regenerate your partner's passion.

Simple actions like holding hands, playful pats and lusty lip-locks can have both of you craving a deeper sexual connection in no time.

And here are the seven ways to further getting things going in the bedroom, and subtly sell your partner on the idea of more sex:

1. Entice your partner with orgasm exploration. Read up on the many types of peaking men and women can have, and let your lover know that you want to explore how both of you can reach new climactic heights.

2. Incorporate fantasy throughout the day. Plant seeds in your partner's head of things you know spark interest. Share a hot thought you had involving an erotic moment you once shared. Describe body parts you miss touching and how you're consumed with longing. Rent a movie with a sexy or romantic storyline. Pursue anything that will put your lover in a sensual state of mind.

3. Stay connected when you do have sex. Don't make sex about physical gratification alone. Truly worship your lover and hail the lovemaking as a celebratory experience -- one you can't get enough of.

4. Keep things novel and spicy in and out of the bedroom. In exploring what turns both of you on when it comes to sex, you can broaden your sexual repertoire. You want to make your lover feel like you're embarking on an adventure, not just going for a simple roll in the hay.

5. Look your best. While we can't look like our supermodel selves 24/7, putting effort into your appearance helps you put out more persuasions. You'll be harder to resist.

6. Engage in verbal foreplay. While men often need sex to feel loved, women often need to feel loved before they engage in sex. The more you engage in all types of erotic talk -- affectionate, romantic, sexy -- the more you'll pique your lover's interest.

7. Consider how you size up sexual satisfaction. Sex doesn't always have to end in intercourse. So rethink your pleasure and the different ways you can realise sexual satisfaction that doesn't necessarily require going 'all the way'.

Lastly, don't forget that honesty is the best policy. Talking openly to each other about what sex means to you without being demanding or putting expectations on each other is often necessary.

Dr Yvonne K Fulbright, a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc, is the author of several books including, Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots.

Illustration: Uttam Ghosh

Source: ANI